Friday, February 26, 2010

The Fat Farm Part Deux – Day of Reckoning

Saturday, my first visit to Beaton Park Fitness Centre

I actually made it, finally. I stayed for over an hour, most of which I was actually working out. Half hour on a recumbent spin bike, keeping my heart rate up to the cardio limit and burning a whopping 75 calories?! WTF? What is that, like 3 cheese puffs? That’s like a half very light beer!

So with that bit of discouragement, I went over to some weight machines that are manufactured by the Marquis de Sade apparently. Remembering what Carly told me when she worked at the Island Fitness Center (parents got to go for free, and I took advantage of that…about 4 times) 3 sets of 15 is about what you want to do. So, merrily I set the weight for something manly and off I went, unexpectedly down the path to develop not big, meaty biceps and legs with rippling, sinewy muscles, but my jolly fat immediately turned to lead. I almost had to lift an arm up to the keyboard to type this, what may be my last message.

I read slowly because I’m always inventing voices for characters, sound effects and often background music scores. In this case, I’m hearing the Darth Vader’s theme, “Done done done done, that poor fat slob is done. Done done done, get a fork ‘cuz he’s done.” I could go on if I wasn’t busy dying!

I’m signing off with a heavy (leaden) heart. If I recover and can actually make it out of bed tomorrow, I guess I’ll do it again.

Your B.I.T.C.H. (Body In Training for Cardio Health), Crikey Craig.

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